You are sitting next to an attractive cougar on the train. The thought of striking up a conversation crosses your mind, but then you freeze. You are unable to whisper even a meek “Hello”. Screw it, you decide, thinking you are not attractive or interesting enough.
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But how important a man’s physical attractiveness really is to cougars? Let me tell you, not much, as women attach much more importance to what’s inside a man than what’s outside. In fact, most women shy away from extremely handsome men.
So, have you changed your mind about approaching that older lady? Do you want to be prepared for the next time you spot an attractive cougar and be armed with techniques on how to pick up a cougar?
This how-to guide will reveal:
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How to Pick Up a Cougar Guide
The terms “Picking up a cougar” or “Cougar pick up” implies a detached attitude about meeting older women, as though qualities like tenderness and caring are only reserved for serious relationships (like eHarmony or Tinder).
Step 1: Know Yourself First
What have you got that drives women wild? Is it your facial features, height, and build, smile, confidence, or humor?
While younger women may prefer handsome younger men of athletic build, mature women have more life experience and they know better than to make assumptions about you based on your appearance.
What this step includes is knowing your strengths and qualities. Ask yourself how you want a hot milf to see you. As sophisticated and elegant? Then, think about how you can create such impressions.
Step 2: Act Your Age
Don’t act older or more mature than you are. That’s one of the reasons she’s probably drawn to you. You don’t have to be an expert in table manners or conversations.
Step 3: Create Your Unique Style
Looks are usually not the number one requirement for success with women, but every young guy wants to look his best when he’s got women on his mind, right?
Creating your own style is by no means an easy task as you don’t want to be someone else’s image.
Here you need to take a look at the qualities you possess and find ways to bring them out. Come up with a hairstyle, an outfit that suits you perfectly, and practice walking more confidently.
Grooming and cleanliness come first, well-cared-for lips and teeth, including clean and freshly cut hair.
You don’t need to be a slave to fashion, but attach some importance to how you dress. Add some accessories, combine colors so the whole comes nicely together, and add a dab of perfume for an additional note of seduction.
Step 4: Think Yes
Always think you will succeed at flirting and seducing her. The man who lacks confidence is his worst enemy.
Women like to be dominated and have decisions made for them. Don’t invite her meekly, insecurely. Instead, approach her with the attitude “Sure she will accept. Asking is simply a matter of formality”.
Step 5: Leave a Good First Impression
First impressions are truly long-lasting impressions. You will do that not only with your appearance but also with your manners and language.
Step 6: Say It Appropriately
Whatever you choose to say as an opening, it should be friendly and light. There are some nice pick-up lines you can use, but steer clear of vulgar, dirty, and disrespectful language. Show respect.
Some older women like it when young men say anything overtly sexual, like “I can’t take my eyes off you” or “I’ve wanted to make love to you every since I first saw you”, but be tactful with these statements and keep them as your surprise comments for when you develop the relationship.
Step 7: Body Language
Look at her in the eye and don’t be afraid to maintain longer eye contact. A direct, unflinching gaze emits confidence and authority. Focus your attention on her but don’t look around the room. Be present.
Keep your hands still. Fidgeting is a sign of nervousness.
Smile, nobody is turned on by a grave face. It is okay to be shy in hookup bars, but nobody wants a living statue. Walk around, smile genuinely and be friendly at women and that’s your first card played.
Use your body and lean forward when talking to her, moving slowly and deliberately, with your legs uncrossed.
Step 8: Notice Things and Let Her Know
Use her name, make remarks about her hair, nails, makeup – this will make her feel special.
Step 9: Compliment Her
Older women are more conscious about how they look. Tell them often that they’re beautiful and sexy. They won’t care as much what you think about their career and ideas as much as they need to know you consider them attractive and hot. It is their body that craves attention. Assure them you like them both outside and inside.
Step 10: Tease Her
Make her laugh by using witty and humorous remarks or questions.
But if she confides in you and tells you about a problem, listen carefully and be very concerned and serious. If she asks your advice, give her an honest piece of advice.
Step 11: Lend a Helping Hand
Offer her a seat on the bus, lit her a cigarette, open the car door for her, help her on with her coat – these aren’t major rescue situations, but they definitely put you in great light to show off a little bit.
Step 12: Instill Trust
Portray positive vibes even when insecure. But how can you ooze confidence when your ego is below zero?
Practice in front of the mirror. Frown. Say something. Shift your eyes around the room. These signs project a powerful image to older women and it is your secret weapon knowing how you look and sound in different situations.
Step 13: Open up
Young men usually stick to the neutral conversation, talking about common topics. That’s an impersonal conversation you can have with practically anyone. The second most common is the pickup talk, which is friendly and highly sexual chatter. But neither promises success.
Instead, be personal and open up. Tell her about your secret dreams, admit to her that you have a strange habit, that you’ve never done something, or that you sleep in pyjamas. Even if your behavior or opinion is unfashionable, it is yours and unique, hence it will be more interesting to a hot cougar.
Step 14: A Doze of Distance
Everybody’s got some things that they don’t share and this part is private. Respect her separateness and her unwillingness to share everything with you.
That said, don’t bombard her with questions about her past relationships or sex life.
To maintain any relationship, a certain distance must be kept, or else you fall victim to jealousy and possessiveness.
Step 15: Ask for Help
Young men don’t really tend to do this. They consider themselves independent and it is embarrassing to them to ask for help.
However, mature cougars like the sense of purpose and being needed. There is no better place for this than a supermarket. Most women will give you both time and advice.
Step 16: Touch Her
Use opportunities to touch her, whether it is a friendly touch, a soft touch or a helping hand. Avoid “grabs” – no caressing of knees or thighs, but keep it polite by touching her hair, face, and back.
Step 17: Keep Her Guessing
Be mysterious in your responses, never truly answering her dying-to-know questions. Don’t negate things, but don’t confirm them, either, if she is wondering whether you like her or not. Don’t reveal your emotions immediately.
Step 18: Show Interest in Meeting Her Again
How do you ask out an older woman? After you have just met a hot cougar woman, give her some signs you want to see her again. Offer to show her around a neighborhood, the best places to eat or see a movie, give your phone number to contact you if she needs help. Show her that you want to hang out.
Step 19: Take Her out to Dinner
Order some nice food and a bottle of wine or champagne. Candles have the power to transform a cold and distant atmosphere into more warm, romantic so it brings a couple closer, so choose restaurants to suit your intentions.
Step 20: Take Her Dancing
Women often complain that men simply won’t dance. That’s such a wasted opportunity because once a person hits the dance floor, they turn into a passionate dancer. Most women claim they feel the most feminine and sexy when dancing, why shouldn’t men?
Learn some steps, practice a little bit or take dance classes and join her.
Step 21: Make Your Move
Once you are certain you have made sufficient contact, don’t back up. Take further action. Pin her against a wall and kiss her passionately. Stand behind her and kiss the back of her neck.
Step 22: Invite Her to Your Place
Show her something personal. Grab a glass of wine and play some soft music. Dance together.
Take it slow and devote time for each phase and you will see that sex with cougars is a lot better than with younger women.
Step 23: Keep It Romantic and New
Don’t stick to comfortable, familiar things. She wants excitement and electricity. Surprise her with a flower, candy, or a ticket for a movie night.
But keep the bigger cards like the talk of marriage to yourself for a lengthy interval.
Step 24: Do Things With Passion
Do something special for her and do it with passion. That “Something” can be just about anything. A hobby or a shared interest can attract a person of the opposite sex immensely.
Like to cook? Prepare a homemade meal and invite a cougar over.
Are you a good driver? Driving is erotic and if you have a passion, use it to your advantage. Use a variety of smooth and aggressive, kiss her when she doesn’t think you will take her to a nice place to surprise her.
Are you a good tennis player? Take her to the tennis court and teach her how to play.
Step 25: Persistence Pays Off
Women are excellent game players, so they won’t say immediately what they mean and they won’t let you win the game so early.
More often, they’ll wait for the perfect moment when you’ve approached them just the way they want under just the right circumstances.
What you can do here is investigate how they want to be approached and try to create the right circumstances. This might take a few tries.
You need her to come to you and for that, you need a routine. It has to be charming and sexy while maintaining an element of distance too.
Step 26: Practice makes perfect
Never give up after the first rejection. Meet cougars various times. This is always necessary before making a connection with an attractive cougar.
Picking up milfs gets easier with practice. There are a lot of little details involved in getting her attention and keeping her interested. Don’t be afraid to experiment and you’ll get better eventually.
Now, here are three things you should NOT do if you want to date cougars successfully:
- Keep money talk to a minimum
- Don’t talk about other women
- Don’t be a drag by telling her about your troubles
Nowadays it is not so unusual to see an attractive 40-year-old woman holding hands with a young man. And why not? They have developed charm, sophistication, understanding, responsibility, independence, sexual awareness, and life experience. Mature cougar women know what they’re doing, so making love with them will be ultra-passionate.
Hopefully, these techniques have given you some ideas to use for cougar dating and answered the question of how to pick up a milf.